Tuesday 19 February 2013

Baby Mama Drama

Hey, hi, hello.

I was writing about something else originally, but recent events have ticked me off so now I’mma switch it up and have a lil rant. Today I’m gonna talk about the dynamics between young parents

First of all let me state that I have no children, so I can only speak on this subject to an extent. I understand that some of you may hold different opinions to me (feel free to leave comments on this post or via twitter or whatever), but this is how I feel about the sh*t.

Let me begin by saying that becoming a parent is a huge responsibility and will alter your life drastically, and with the alteration come a whole new breed of intergalactic stress *Buzz Lightyear voice* "To infinity and beyond!" I was raised to believe that by making  the conscious decision to have a child, you are accepting that your life is no longer about you, it is about doing the best for your child that you can and allowing them not to be deprived of things that you are able to provide. Having a child means you must let go of some of your selfishness….some people aren’t able to grasp this concept -_-.

I’ve always said that when I have a child it will be with a man I can see myself being with for near enough the rest of my life, and that I’ll be in a stable position so my child can have the kind of upbringing I had, or better. This is something that I believe everyone wants, but unfortunately sometimes it doesn’t work out this way. Now understand this, even if you don’t get your white picket fence Disney dream of family life, those values shouldn’t go out of the window just because the situation doesn’t fit your vision, remember, it’s not about YOU any more.

Once you have a child with someone, you are connected to that person FOR LIFE (*sings* I’m loooocked up, they won’t let me out!’) because you now share offspring. It is both of your duties to work as a unit to make sure that child knows it’s loved.  Now when it comes to young parents, it is common that the relationship will break down because they are still kids themselves, and more time (we all know this urban tale) the father will claim he wants nothing to do with the child because he didn’t want them in the first place.

For the men, excuse me, BOYS, that do this, you should be ashamed of yourself! That child didn’t create themselves, so why would you be so cruel as to be absent from their lives because you don’t want to be with the mother? It’s you that sexed her you know! She didn’t withdraw the sperm from your testicles while you were asleep and inject her ovaries, Mr Long Distance Stulla! More time, those boys that are sh*t absent fathers were neglected by their dad’s, so they know how it feels to feel unwanted, which is why I don’t understand why you would inflict that on another individual; on your own child!

Now don’t get me wrong, I know how some of these girls are –Trapping is REAL –but as a man, do what you can to face up to your responsibilities.

While we’re on the subject of trapping; b*tches, is you dumb? Why do some of you sell yourself these epic delusions of grandeur in which you think that by having a man’s child, it will make him stay with you? -_- I really don’t understand? Before you went and got breed up, how many simple bitches did you see that basic bitch move NOT work for? Did you think you would be the exception to the rule orrrr? I mean for f*cks sake, look at how many single parent families there are; do you need a slap?

Now if it’s a thing where you tried that chupidness (had to dash a bit of West Indian hostility in there) and it didn’t work out how you wanted, b*tch deal with it accordingly, because your ass knew better! Some of you want to use the excuse that you’re young so you didn’t really know any better -‘I was naïve’ –b*tch sit the f*ck down! You wasn’t no kinda naïve when you were spreading your legs and doing pornstar tricks askin’ my man how ‘tun up’ he thinks your Dvanjango is, were you? Nah! When all that was going down you was bussin them Huggies Pull Ups lyrics *sings* “I’m a big kid now! :D” The cheek!

In these sort of situations, you will be LUCKY to trap a man that is still willing to care of his yout’, and even then some of you lot wanna stay moving psychotic, using your child as a weapon. Why do you think your baby is an M16 pliss? 

Do you know how many women have had a child with someone and had them bounce on them,that are now struggling to get by, that would be so grateful for their child’s father to care enough to give them money and look after them? A LOT, SIMPLE B*TCH! Some of you are lucky enough to have a half decent person willing to take care of their baby, and you do some stupid ass basic b*tch sh*t just because he don’t want YOU. That is selfish.

With some baby mothers,  every time you don’t  do what they want, they have that baby loaded and ready to shoot at you because  they know that, that child is their only means of power when it comes to their baby father, and they have allowed themselves to get bitter (and we all know how misery loves company), so if they aint happy, n*gga you aint allowed to be happy either. That scornful woman will drag you down to hell with her. Let her see you so much as crack a smile, “Oh no you don’t mutha f*cka! YOU AINT SEEIN’ YO BABY NO MORE! SMILE NOW, B*TCH!”

To all the baby mothers out there that are mature and selfless enough to accept that even though they and their partner didn’t work out, it doesn’t mean that the family unit can’t compromise and find a way to work, I applaud you. Although I am not a mother, I understand how much it can hurt to be around someone that has hurt you, or that you feel uncomfortable around, so the fact that you are putting those feelings aside for the sake of your child makes you even more amazing than you are already! YOU GO GLEN COCO!

There are certain situations, for example, if the father is a danger to you or your child, that makes it completely understandable to cut all ties because that is the responsible thing to do. If you are not in one of those situations and you’re denying the father access because he doesn’t want you, you need to fall back with that unorthodox woman rage, and try for your child to make things work. Trying to make someone else miserable won’t make you happy.


The cheek of some of you is, you will have a guy willing to step up and be a father, but your crazy bitch anger is denying him access, and then in that same breath you are ready to sit down and gun him off for not being around when it’s your fault he aint there in the first place, making up dumb reasons to put the blame on him ‘If he really wanted to be here he would find a way!’ These times, every time he tries you wanna start World War III and you give him bullshit ultimatumsGive me a million pounds and leave your girlfriend then you can see your child for half an hour in a contact centre while I supervise. It’s my way or the high way!Grow the fuck up you spiteful ass b*tch.

Some of you are so wicked to each other, it’s unreal. Regardless of the situation, it’s as if you no longer look at the other person as a person, you just think that because you are in this predicament that they should just deal with whatever you throw at them and like it. WRONG! With some of you, I am not even surprised that your baby father gave up on you. You’re so focused on making each other miserable that you have lost sight of what is important; your child.

For you fathers that aren’t even making the effort to look after your own child; you don’t even deserve to be a part of their lives. When they get older and the tables turn where you finally wanna step up and be a man and it’s your child that doesn’t want anything to do with you, you will only have yourself to blame.

It is not an easy job to be a parent, and it’s even harder to be a single parent because you now have to fulfil two roles instead of one. It’s not enough to stay absent because you told her not to have the baby because you weren’t ready, the child is here now, you need to move past that childish mindset. Do the right thing; it’ll serve you better in the long run. If you are one of those people who were neglected by your father, can you imagine how awful it would feel to find out that your baby feels about you, the way you feel about him? I don’t imagine any of you want that, so make the effort.

I TACKLE A SIMILAR ISSUE IN MY BOOK 'THE UNFAMOUS' IN WHICH A GEORGIA
Georgia Daniels played by Emma Malyszczuk
TRIES TO TRAP NATHANIEL WITH CARTER'S CHILD (SOUNDS JUICY RIGHT?).
Carter Johnson played by Robert Griffiths and Nathanial Gibson played by Marcus Campbell
 YOU CAN CHECK IT OUT >> HERE << (Pssst; the Unfamous web series, coming soon)

Here's a @SwearDownTV video I did called 'The Parent Trap' in which myself and Dee Poetry Jay discuss young parents: http://youtu.be/YMNBI9atCmM



As I said at the start of the post, feel free to leave comments (make sure you share this too).

Follow me @ScottyUnfamous

Till next time

Sx


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